…and don't call boys.

Episode Six: critical condition

This is the episode with Nina Katz, the face girl. She’s a total bitch, but Carrie shouldn’t feel threatened because she says dumb things like “I am starvation central.”

I love that Miranda and Samantha both scream at Carrie because they don’t have time to listen to her whine, and then Stanford tells her how selfish she is. Ha.

Are you gonna do a herkie now?

Episode Ten: boy, interrupted

Since I have a lot of quotes from this one, I’m pretty much going to let them do the talking.

Okay, he’s not my favorite single-episode boyfriend, but he’s the best match for Carrie. It’s David Duchovny, and he plays her high school sweetheart (“We were in a liplock for most of 1982”). The thing is, he’s committed himself to a “therapeutic community,” because he’s “trying to figure out why somethings are harder for me than they are for other people.”

Marcus used to be a hooker, Charlotte used to be a cheerleader and prom queen, and Samantha used to be British (not really). We do get a guest spot from Ginger Spice, looking crap-tastic as always.

Miranda gets courtside tickets to a charity basketball game, and while they’re gossiping in the stands, Charlotte gets it right when she says “I don’t think that these people know those people,” meaning gay men and Knicks fans.

“It was Friday night, it was the big game, and Miranda was jealous of a cheerleader.” The girl they’re talking about, “the blond one in the front,” is whore-iffic. She keeps sticking her tongue out. Then Miranda and Robert make out in the mail room and get busted, but it looks like they’re making out in front of their lockers (because of the high school theme).

Ha. No one knows Samantha has clients that go to the looney bin “because I’m good at my job.”

Stanford and that “little bitchy pine nut” Anthony hate each other, but they co-existed peacefully at Charlotte’s wedding earlier this season. Of course, Carrie and Stanford are crowned “Queen and Queen” of the GLBT prom, but then the voiceover does that “we forgot to mention NYC in this episode” thing and tacks it on to the very end: “Anything is possible; this is New York.”